Grace accepted Jeff’s offer. There were many reasons why she did. To begin with, her tutor was cajoling her continuously to find part time work to practise her skills and with Jeff appearing each day during the following week to help Anna but taking Grace off to chat with him about his proposal and instead whispering to her how much he missed her when they were apart. Against her will, Grace was being persuaded to accept his offer. The rate of pay he was offering was tempting too. Nowhere else would she be paid as well for the little amount of work he was asking her to do. It was much more than the National minimum she would be paid elsewhere as an unqualified, inexperienced eighteen year old. She accepted him and felt cheap as the words left her mouth. If her mother, her best friend in the world, should ever come to know about this, she would be horrified. Grace could not tell Anna for fear of disrupting Anna’s work and their friendship with the Andrew’s family. Grace knew that had she talked to her mother the moment Jeff had asked her in the kitchen, she might have gotten her daughter out of the mess. But Grace knew she was in too far now. Jeff was certainly out to use her and she should have been strong and said no to him. Jeff, however, had not stopped his persistent questioning but had become gentler in his approach, realising that to get his way, he would need to give Grace some time. He did not give her space though, and stayed close at hand for a week until the day she said yes.
Once she had agreed, the thoughts that she had before, the doubts, did not go away. She knew that Jeff was mid-forties meaning that this lust for adultery was a reaction to midlife, or else he had done it for his entire married life, shielding it from his wife and it was Grace’s turn in the spotlight. She knew he was after a virgin; he had told her so in no uncertain terms. Grace did not tell him that she did not quite fit the bill and unfortunately, did not use it as a get-out clause. Grace also knew that she could have said no, could still say no and wait for him to turn his eyes onto someone else or wait for him to grow out of the phase. All these options featured regularly in Grace’s mind but she was too young to realise the magnitude of her actions and not mature enough to be brave and finish it. She felt something that she called love. When she was in a more sober state of mind, she knew that she was enjoying possessing the attention of a man, something she had never really known thus far. Throughout her early and mid-teens, with dancing lessons and singing with the choir and acting parts, her free time had been limited and usually spent on her own with her pets or with her girl friends.
Now at a different college, she saw little of her friends, as they had gone away for the year or had gone to University so Grace found she was on her own even more. In the weeks that followed, Grace found her free afternoons in Jeff’s car, having a lift home and having the occasional detour to a secluded place for an hour or two. Anna thought Jeff was kind to take Grace to his office rather than make her spend money on petrol and then bring her home after a few hours. In truth, Grace had done no administrative work for Jeff and probably never would. When they were together in the afternoons, she and Jeff talked at first, telling one another between frantic and passionate kisses what they would do were they free to be together. They planned a future together each afternoon. Grace tried to convince herself that she was not doing something wrong; affairs and adultery were as regular in life as smoking, drinking and drugs. In all honesty, Grace preferred when he had to get home early to look after his sons, when they would only be able to talk during the journey and she could feel less guilt ridden on arrival home.
As Christmas drew near, Jeff and Anna’s work together shut down for the holiday season, and G6race saw very little of Jeff. They had spent more and more time together and Anna was pleased that her daughter was working well for Jeff. Anna, like Lisa, remained oblivious to the couple’s relationship, however, Jeff and Grace were extremely careful and under the guise of Grace working for Jeff, they managed to get away with their frequent and irregular meetings. It was Christmas Eve when of Grace accidentally ran into the entire Andrews family, at the Midnight service. Grace had come alone, as Anna had been invited to an impromptu party. Leaving late, Grace had managed to sidle into the church as the lights were dimmed. The church was left lit only by the soft glow of candlelight, as Grace felt her way to a spare bit of pew. Unfortunately, she looked up to find Jeff sitting next to her, with Lisa and the boys on his other side. In the darkness, no one saw her blushing.
Grace found through the sermon her brain was having a mad skirmish with itself. In front of the Lord, within one thought, Grace begged for forgiveness and strength to finish the foolish affair she had begun with the tall, handsome man on her right, and with another, wondered if he would ever reach out, under the cover of darkness, to take her hand that she had so carefully placed by his side on the pew. Grace sat there in the church within which she had been baptised and confirmed. Surrounded by old friends and neighbours she felt exceedingly vampish. As the sermon entered its conclusion, she felt a warmth cross her hand and her heart. After surreptitiously moving his hand across his line, Jeff, moved his hand to his side of the pretence of making himself more comfortable on the hard, wooden pew. Slowly, their fingers began to interlink within the shadows between them, slowly rubbing knuckles and fingers, they held hands the remainder of the service.
As soon as the lights came back on and she said goodnight and bade the family are very merry Christmas, the whole tenderness and magic of the sermon had vanished between them. Their hug goodbye was brief and showed no warmth and as they let go, both valiantly hoped they looked normal on the surface. Grace left of the Andrew’s family and walked to her car, her face burning and suddenly resolved that if it was a business only deal he was after, then that what was what he would receive.